Roger's Rating:

Once you get past the box and title of this flick (Hopefully a playful nod to Mike John and not the slap is appears to be.) then there is something great. I don't mind cum-swallowing flicks at all and I think that the No Cum Dodging stuff has been great. On the other hand there is something very hot about a pretty girl getting nailed in the face by a hot load of ball batter. Obviously I am not the only one. Just look at the popularity of bukkake flicks and those German movies with girls nearly drowning in sperm. Chico Wang has put together some really nice faces for what should be a simple trip to facial-ville. Then again, nothing is simple when Chico is in charge.

Delilah Strong talks to Chico about how she equates cum to money since she is in fact, a whore. (Got to love way the romance flows through these little chats.) Just moments later she is taking loads of cream on her pretty face. Delilah rubs her pussy as the cum drips slowly down her cheek and more DNA is added to the mix. Basically it's a mini-bukkake scene that doesn't end until she is wearing every drop on her face and chest.

Roxy Jezel is always up for a few shots on her pretty face. She is the kind of girl who needs more than just cum though. Roxy likes to fuck and she gets two guys to fuck the shit out of her in this scene. There is some intense DP action going on as she gets plowed in both holes. We also get some outstanding anal as she keeps her mouth busy while her sphincter gets seriously stretched. They reward her hard work with two good loads right on her face and tongue. As a bonus, she gives another guy a shot at her face while she sits on the toilet and takes a leak.

Leah Luv is having trouble with her braces so Chico offers her some special oral lubricant. Within seconds she is surrounded by six guys who are ready to shoot loads all over her cute little face. They first right onto her braces and pretty soon the cream is bubbling out from the corners of her mouth You have to love the way this girl smiles through the whole line of sperm doners, finally giving us a wave and saying good bye.

Paige Turner is a hot girl from Utah who is probably my favorite new girl at the moment. She is totally gorgeous; fresh faced and looks ready to fuck like a pro. Chico has fun talking to her about how much she hates her mother and does porn to get back at her. (Chico, dude…why not just have her give dear old mom a call on her cell?) Once that is out of the way, she takes a big cock in her mouth and starts sucking. When it is nice and wet she spreads her legs and mounts his lap. Watching Paige fuck for the first time I think I am falling more and more in lust with her. There are plenty of shout-outs to mom, but most of the attention is bound to be on this hot little babe and the way she takes hard dick in her pussy. Even though she only has one guy to shoot on her face, he had a big load so Paige gets properly decorated.

Chanel Chavez is another fantastic little slut who ends up playing a part in an odd little scene that involves rednecks, a dildo on a hook and Chico voice-over about the North American Whore Fish. At any rate, she has swim goggle on as the guys take turns unloading on her pretty face. She looks a little bored which is not indicative of the way this little Latina can fuck.

Delilah is back for her full scene and this time we actually get to her hear talk a little bit. She is a stripper and a hooker apparently. Their conversation about her career as a working girl is pretty interesting, but it's more fun to watch her suck cock. Two big cocks give her enough meat to play with and Delilah still looks like she could take on a few more. She is all over the place, showing great energy and making it tough to follow her with the camera. At one point the guys hold her down so she can be fucked and have a big set of balls stuffed in her mouth at the same time. When the guys shoot both loads into her mouth, Delilah holds it there until it's time to spit it onto the camera. No swallowing allowed indeed. For a bonus load, she gets pulled out of the shower and thrown onto the bed where her pussy is stuffed with big black dick. This quick scene features some great cowgirl and another big load for her money-makin' face.

Dillan Lauren explains that she doesn't like cum in her eyes. To keep herself safe from that sort of discomfort, Chico gives her some cheap little glasses to catch the spunk. The guys take aim and start painting them with thick goo. Anyone with a sunglasses fetish might find this part interesting.

Roxy is back to give a very nervous guy his first rimjob. The homo-erotic level in the room is really high as Chico gives us a running commentary while Roxy licks that ass and then takes a load on her forehead.

Leah is back, telling us how much she likes black cum. Her mouth gets stuffed with black cock and even with the braces on, she handles it pretty well. That pretty little pussy is all shaved and ready to be fucked raw. The guy likes her mouth so much that he pulls out of her twat and stuffs it between her lips once again. This little girl is very happy with the size of his rod and enthusiastically rides it until it's nearly poking out through the top of her head. The piledriver is great and he works up a big load that gets shot all over her braces. This girl is a dirty little thing and we love her that way. After a quick shower she gets fucked again, this time in a POV boff that ends with…of course…another shot on the braces.

Delilah is back, talking once again about being a hooker and then stripping for “Governor” Arnold. The pretty girl talks us through a blowjob and moans happily with her young mouth full of throbbing man meat. After a solid blowjob, she gets a big load right on her forehead. You can almost see the dollar signs light up in her pretty eyes.

Chanel gets a chance to do her scene without the goggles. She is so bubbly that she can't be contained. Brian Surewood finds a way to calm her down though, slipping a cock between her lips while another guy comes in and rams his meat right up her tight ass. This little babe looks great with a dick in her mouth and really takes it well between the cheeks. With two guys fucking the shit out of her, Chanel starts cumming and can't get enough of the DP action they are throwing down on her. That tiny body gets smashed between the two guys who fuck her about as hard as they can. Chanel takes it perfectly and has her legs flailing. This is probably one of the best scenes Chico has ever shot and certainly one of the hottest I have seen this year. Put Chanel on the short list for sexiest babe of 2005 and when she takes two more big loads, move her up a couple of notches.

Roxy still needs more cum so she lies on the grass while a collection of guys stands over her for a bukkake-style face bath. That pretty face gets glazed over by a number of loads and some of the guys even thank her. Ain't that sweet? Not half as sweet as this dirty Brit is.

Dillan Lauren has to come back for her big scene. She is power fucked in the mouth by three guys at once. Taking cock from both ends, Dillan makes that lovely gagging noise that is so popular in movies today. The anal is really good and she has a fantastic body. I just think that we have seen better scenes before this one so it's hard to live up to the intensity we saw from Chanel. Don't get me wrong, Dillan looks lovely, takes it in the ass like a champ and does A2M like the dicks are coated with candy. Her big facial finish closes out a very impressive piece of work and is the last full-fuck scene of the day.

Paige returns with a bad facial itch. She won't stop scratching so they put one of those dog cone things on her neck. That leaves her totally at the mercy of the guys who want to shoot cream all over her face and into the cone. This isn't the prettiest segment ever, but anyone who likes bukkake will love the fact that this pretty young babe is willing to go for something like this.

This is a really long movie, but unlike many of the three hour gonzos out there, this flick mixes in some additional scenes to fill the time. Each girl gets her own “full” scene, but they also show up for some intense facial footage as well. There is a whole lot of facial footage, so fans who have missed the sight of babes with spooge on their mugs will want to tune in. Some of the stuff includes mini-bukkakes without the lengthy (and highly homo-erotic) jerk-off lines. The girls are really cute and though they all have the sort of faces that you just want to bust a nut all over. Paige and Chanel are fucking superstars in the making, clearly at the head of the class for 2005. Roxy is already a super slut and Leah is just about the cutest little thing you could imagine. There are some wacky detours along the way, but you have to expect that with Chico at the helm. Overall the sex is good, the facials are excellent and the girls are a wet dream come true. That's enough to make it a great stroke flick for facial-loving perverts everywhere.

Copyright © Roger T. Pipe

Posted By Roger, www.excaliburfilms.com | 10/5/06 1:58 PM